Thursday, April 19, 2012


Many of my posts seem dark or angry. I'm really not all that angry.
I am actually pretty happy most of the time. I love to laugh and make jokes. As they say, all comedy comes from tragedy, so really everything I write is funny, right?
One would think that looking down the barrel of a gun would bring a bit of anxiety. Most of the time that would be true, but in this case, it warrants casual disregard. It's not that I think the person holding the gun will not pull the trigger, it is really that I just don't care.
My day started out with a bad drive to work, being met at the door by HR and security, losing my job because of a coworker with a grudge. A shittier drive to a bar. An excessive amount of alcohol, even worse drive halfway to my empty, underwater, home with the remainder being on foot. Police pounding on my door, no doubt in reference to my car being parked in a telephone pole, a jog out the back door and down the alley. Continuous vomiting. more running and vomiting. Finding another bar and then being thrown out for lude and lascivious behavior, or disorderly conduct. or both. More walking and vomiting. Asking schoolkids where I can score some drugs and them pointing the way. Buying some sort of powdery substance from a sketchy looking toothless grinner and a quick ingestion. A quick up, a fight ensues and me leaving a drug den with some money, drugs, and a hand full of what I think is hair. More running and vomiting. A visit to a corner market, grabbing some bagged food items, throwing down the drugs on the counter, picking them up and throwing down some money. Eating various foods out of bags and leaving a trail for anyone to follow.
Several hours of black.
Awaking to find a gun pushing my eyebrow into my head.
A brief sense of regret? Too late for that now....

Tuesday, April 17, 2012

Trying to sell a car

Selling a car should be easy. But it really isn't. One would think offering a car up for sale for an incredibly low price, one could dump, I mean sell, a car quickly. People ask a lot question, too. Like "what are all these dents from?" and "Are those stolen credit cards on the floor?" and "Is this blood?"
Do you want the car or not? Shit.

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Strange Brew

What a fun movie. It is the greatest version of Hamlet ever made. Or of Rosencrans and Guildenstern. Whatever.
"come to the dark side, you knob."