Monsters

What I don't understand about people who to find monsters, like Bigfoot, is why would someone want to find a monster? One more scary thing on this planet to worry about? No, thanks. Leave the imaginary monsters where they are. In the minds of crazy people.
  I guess I think there are plenty scary enough things that already exist. Things like child molesters, terrorists, Jimmy Buffet, rapists. I mean really, like we need something creepier than ostriches. Have you see an ostrich up close? They are fucking freaky. Their heads stay straight while it moves up, down, left or right. That long weird neck and the huge talons on their feet. Freeee-keeee. Gah. Freaky.
  Or how about cabbage patch dolls. All nylon-y with yarn covered melons for heads. Ew.
Have you seen Axl Rose and Lana Del Ray together? *shudder*
There is plenty of scary without finding out Bigfoot lives behind your house and is hungry.